I see my son on the playground, a little boy comes up to him and makes a comment about his PJ Mask shirt and how they are “his favorite” and BAM instant friends. They run off and start pretending to be able to fly and have super human strength and speed. They take turns saving each other from the imaginary super villains and are having a blast doing it. I see such confidence in my son and think I ought to try and be a bit more like him. My eyes start to wander around me for something I can start a conversation on with the women close to me. I see a stick! I picture myself picking it up and saying “Wingardium Leviosa!” She’d look at me in surprise and then say  “It’s LeviOsa, not LevioSA” and just like magic we’ll be instant friends too.

Instead I don’t say a word, and just do that awkward half smile and eyebrow raise when we make eye contact, you know the one, where someone looks like they might talk to you but then they think better of it. I end up not saying a word cause I’m worried she’ll just be a movie fan and probably have not even read the books every year like I do. (Always.)

Confidence as an adult can be a bit more tricky then it was as a kid. I’m convinced its because we all have Harry Potter quotes floating around in our heads but are just too afraid that its too good to be true. So often I find myself second guessing who I am as a person. My brain highlights key words and phrases of negative things that have been said to me throughout my life.

Past: “Thats not a great joke.”  brain: Don’t try to be funny. No-one will get your jokes.

Past: “You need to loosen up.” brain: you shouldn’t go to that “fun” event, you’ll drag the party down.

Past: “Nobody wants you here.” brain: be quite and don’t draw attention to yourself, or better yet just leave before they reject you. 

The list could go on.. But this paired with my quite voice and tendency to mumble, (“sorry, what did you say”) doesn’t make for a whole confident Sariena on the inside. Which is funny cause I actually get comments a lot on my confidence, go figure. But I think the reason my son has such confidence in himself is because, well, he likes himself.  SO I thought I’d share some of the positive affirmations I speak over myself in hopes it will inspire you to love on yourself a little more and to build your confidence on the inside.

❤ Cue all the vulnerability.

I like me. I am seen and wanted. God has given me a silly and serious personality. I am a good mother, I see my kids and can help with what they need. 

He didn’t make a mistake when He made me.

If you are unsure or feel awkward talking to yourself in this way try starting with these prompts.

• What would you say if your best friend spoke about themselves the way you talk about yourself?
• What does God say about you? (Hint: you are fearfully and wonderfully made.)